Tall Girl Problems
Ten problems only tall people can relate to
It’s all well and good complaining about being short, but what about the ladies at the opposite end of the spectrum? Being tall has its perks (dominating twister and clear views at concerts), but with great height comes great responsibility… and even greater problems. For anyone out there who's experienced the trials and tribulations of tallness, I've compiled a list of ten problems faced by tall girls on a daily basis...
You never have enough leg room
Oh the dreaded long-haul flight! Whilst everyone else can enjoy their complimentary leg room and in-flight booze, you spend ten long hours trapped like a sardine wishing you’d taken up a career as a contortionist. You think it can’t get any worse, when the small child in front of you tilts their chair back to spite you even further... because they CLEARLY need the extra leg room. Sort it out JetStar!
It’s hard keeping your long limbs at bay on a normal day, but try balancing on your lengthy legs after sinking ten pints and a couple of Jägerbombs at Tiger Lil's on a Saturday night. Your high centre of gravity makes it near-on impossible to stand straight after a few bevvies…. and you have a lot further to fall than most people!
The undersized desk
Whilst all your friends spent school life tucked away all snug under their desks, you hit puberty four years too early and subsequently faced the daily challenge of maneuvering your body to fit under poorly designed classroom furniture. Here’s a visual representation of the result…
Finding a suitable match
Your friends are all partnering up, getting engaged and having babies, but you’re still stood there, vodka in hand, waiting for your seven foot Prince Charming (and Perth's dating scene is hard as it is). Ladies, there’s nothing wrong with dating a shorter man ...think Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise in their good days.
You’re constantly forced to wear flats
You’re all dressed up for a night out in Leedy with the girls… hair, make-up, dress on point. You’ve bought a new pair of heels to compliment your outfit, but the only friends you seem to attract are near enough five foot. For the sake of group photos, you're once again forced to sacrifice your Laboutin's (wishful thinking) for a pair of average-looking flats.
Gym squats are just SO much harder!
Whilst your five foot gym buddy is speeding through a set of 50 squats, you’re stuck struggling on number 10. You have at least a foot further to squat than the average-sized person, but on the bright side you have fantastic glutes and you’re acing yoga class.
Deadly door frames
Tall people spend their lives dodging and ducking through door frames and low-built inanimate objects... there's a deadly world up there that shorties just don't see
The "That’s a nice top" comment
Shopping as a short girl can be a nightmare, but at least you’ve got the option to get clothes taken up. Unfortunately for tall people, the option to add on material doesn’t exist. This is where the boundary between top and dress can become a little blurred… queue the disapproving mom comments.
The festival farce
For Southbound regulars, height isn't always a perk... you spend most your time with another human being attached to your shoulders or moving out the way for smaller festival-goers, before resigning to the back of the crowd with the oldies away from all human contact.
People telling you that you're tall
Because clearly in your 20 years of living on this planet, you've never stopped to contemplate your own height... thanks for the memo though